Saturday, 4 August 2012

Intellectualizing Emotions

Not feeling super motivated to write Stryder's Dementia this week.  My head's been in a weird place for a while...not a bad place necessarily, but I think my decision making abilities have hit some sort of snag.  I guess I just either don't know or won't quite admit to myself what I really want..

Stupid human emotions and needs.  I much prefer the cold hard logic of rationality to the wishy-washy foolishness of emotion, and yet as a human, so many of my decisions are based on how I "feel" about things...considering feelings are arbitrary uncontrolled reactions which are constantly in motion, it's the least solid foundation to base any decision on...

This is why when we used to play games as children I always wanted to be Spock.  Not a choice that made me a particularly popular child.

I suppose it's all fun and games when your thoughts and feelings are working in harmony.  Sadly, my intellect tells me to go one way and my emotions tell me to go the other a little too frequently lately.  It's a hazard when I'm just trying to keep my life as simple as I can...

I have a feeling that if I was a multimillionaire type, I'd be a hermit and a complete eccentric...far more Howard Hughes than Bruce Wayne...considering my strategy for dealing with any emotional issue is usually to withdraw completely.

Oh well I'm sure I'm overly concerned...I really put too much thought into things that seem to come naturally to everyone else.

OR maybe my head is just slow from too much humidity and WAY too much BEER this week.  Neither are legendary great influences on my life, nor are either particularly enjoyable to me these days.  Let's not do THAT again, right?

I'm over it...please September get here soon...I need the Fall...

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