Rumination

Text to a girl from Lake Ontario:

The waves crashing into shore today are uncouth and full of wrath, like a drunken lover who has just struck you in the face.  Personally, I love it.  Shades of October in July.  Must be a storm brewing somewhere over the water.

A Different Kind of Poem:

she speaks to me in starlight
in the depths of night she comes
and whispers of shadows and sorrows,
laughter and song
and secrets known to none
save she and I
under the light of a crescent moon

she loved me as well as she could
somewhat less than I might have liked.

The Dark Knight

Third "Chris Nolan" Batman film, The Dark Knight Rises opens in theatres today and I've already got my ticket per-ordered.  Going to see it in about 3 hours - first showing of the day around here!  Only one step less geeky than if I'd gone to a midnight screening last night (with my job, 3 am is a
"wake-up" time, not a "just got out of the movie" time).  I've had Batman on the brains since the moment my alarm clock sounded and I'm sure I'll be batty all day long!

What IS the appeal of The Batman?  I'm a 35 year old man with a career and a divorce and a blue-collar life!  Yet I purchase new comics every Wednesday (and every New Comic Book Day features a BATMAN title!), I WRITE reviews of almost everything I buy, (fruitlesspursuits.com anyone?), I have all the episodes of the animated series and all the movies at home to watch any time, I have more than one Batman t-shirts (I used to have one for every day of the week, but sadly they've worn out over the years)...Action figures...Joker and the Batman are fighting in plastic right in front of me as I TYPE this!  Lego...Video games...dishware...UNDERWEAR....bat-logo air freshener...the list goes ON and ON...

Why?  Is this normal?

Honestly, I have no real idea what the appeal of Batman or all of the other superheros, Transformers, etc that I have really let dominate my interior decorating (both apartment and mind) for years and years actually is.  It borders on the religious and is probably indicitive of some sort of emotional or deep-seated childhood issues.  It must fulfill some unconscious NEED.  Like Batman's mission itself.

Or maybe it's just COOL AS HECK!!!!

*hehe I said "heck"

I'm not going to bother over-analyzing my bat-love.  I don't care WHAT it says about me.  I know I'm in good company. 

Now then...To the Batmobile!!!

NO!! Well....Maybe....

 I've been noticing a trend both amusing and disturbing in my life recently...not that it is a recent trend, but that it's recently been more noticeable to me.

It seems like lately, whenever the opportunity to go "outside the box" comes along, my first instinct is to say "No thanks, I'm good."

Luckily I am easily persuaded to change my mind, or else I'd probably never do anything.

It makes me laugh, sometimes, because it reminds me of my dad when I was young.  His first answer for anything was and is almost always "No" too.  Of course it becomes a "well...maybe...." pretty quickly.  It's just like, No is the default answer to buy time until we've thought it through or something.  So perhaps it's genetic?  One of my dad's favourite lines is "you get that from your mother's side" but this is one tendency he can't blame on her!

Anyway, my concern is, having recognized this tendency in myself and not wanting to be left out of anything, I am starting to over-think saying "No" to anything!   This, I'm afraid, is going to eventually come along and bite me in the ass.  If nothing else if the pendulum swings too far I'll burn myself out...

Oh well, the pertinent part of the above paragraph is "Over-Think".  If I say "yes" to something I am not entirely sure about and it works out, great!  If not, at least I'll have an interesting story to tell.  "No" just leaves me sitting on the couch watching T.V.  We already KNOW how that story ends.

2nd Quarter Round-up 2012!!

Can you believe that we're half-way through 2012?!?!  Where DOES the time go?  So far it's been a pretty interesting year.  Let's see if I'm living up to my own expectations, as set down HERE and HERE...I think I'm doing OK so far... 

1.  My number one priority this year - be OUT OF DEBT before 2013!

Well so far this year I've paid $5850.00 which is a little less than I wanted.  However, if my math is correct I can pay about $1100 a month from now till December and have more than paid off my debt in full.  I always tend to make more money in the second half of the year anyway, what with my taxes and deductions and such being maxed out so I don't see this as being a problem at all...still, could be better.  Half credit.

2.  Maintain my weight in the 135-155 range, while actually building a little muscle and tone.

Weighing myself this morning revealed that I am 147 pounds, so I'm in my right weight range.  I've gained some weight in the last 3 months, but my B.M.I. stayed the same...the reason?  I've been exercising like a mad man...almost every day but a MINIMUM of 4 days a week...more often 6.  Because of this I've actually gained weight in MUSCLE!?!  For only the second time in my life I am capable of doing pull-ups and whatnot.  I'm pretty excited about what will happen if I keep it up for a year or more, since it's really only been 4 of 5 months of exercise.  I AM a little worried that it'll cause too much weight gain though.  It's a fine line...we'll see how it goes. 

3. Memorize one song a month, chords and lyrics, throughout 2012.

Total fail.  Boourns.   I have been playing a lot of guitar and jamming a lot and even working on original material, both mine and my friends.  However, I have failed to really even try particularly hard on this one.  I hope to at least get 4 songs for the year.  Way way less than 12.  So far I still have 2.  Hmmmm.... 

4.  Write lots!

So far so good with this....I've managed at least one article a week both here and at Fruitless Pursuits, plus occasional bonus stuff and I've been writing in my notebooks a lot too....either stuff that eventually ends up on this site or backstory and whatnot for a couple projects I have in my brain.  I could be a lot more dedicated still but I do think I'm improving in this regard...at the very least, I haven't gotten any worse! 

5. Schedule one half day a month to really clean my apartment and keep it looking nice.

I always look at my apartment and see the things that still need to be cleaned.  However, I was pleasantly surprised the other day when my friend's girlfriend, who hadn't been to my place for some time, complimented me on it "never looking cleaner"!  That was on a day when I thought it was actually much dirtier than usual.  I guess my standards have improved!!  I was flattered!  I haven't really "scheduled" any cleaning days as I wrote above but I do tend to look towards keeping everything need all the time anyway and make sure I at least clean the bathroom and such a lot.  I REALLY need to get my bedroom in some sort of order though.  The rest of the place looks good, but, like my subconscious mind, my bedroom is cluttered with stuff I'd rather not think about gathering dust in the corners... 

Well, 3.5 out of 5 isn't too bad I guess.  I'll have to see what I can do to pick it up in the next 6 months.  I know Summer has just begun, but you know what they say... 

Winter is Coming.